Before the Show: Batten down the hatches!
5/19/2011
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides opens tonight at 12:01 midnight. Will I be there? No, I’ll be eating at 4:30 and in bed by 8:30. And no, I’m not getting old!
Disney has promoted this film quite heavily. I think the first teaser came out last summer. So now, the test is: will it fall victim to Godzilla Disease? Remember when in 1998 when there was a Godzilla trailer on every movie for a year, then we saw that pile of lizard poo. Sorry, leave Godzilla to the Japanese (you should have said no Ferris Bueller?)!
The last two Pirates movies were a mess. While watching the second and third, we had to batten down the hatches from all the muddy water that was being flung our way. The first movie was a fun ride. Then 2 and 3 came along trying to make an almighty trilogy but it just plundered. Yet, I am truly excited about this new one!
What’s not to love? We get a solid performance of Captain Jack Sparrow! (no Will Turner to get in the way). There’s a fun and simple plot— pirates searching for the fabled Fountain of Youth. Freakin’ awesome, by the way! Blackbeard – pirate of all pirates! Penelope Cruz! Oh-la-la.
After At Worlds End, I hung up my tricorn and eye patch but with On Stranger Tides, I’ve dusted them off and I’m proud to say, “Arrrr!” once again.
Denver Comic Con
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
After the Show: Found my Thor religion!
After the Show: Found my Thor religion!
5/6/2011
Remember in Lethal Weapon when Murtaugh tells Riggs, “I’m too old for this sh--!” I always say that after I go to a 12:01 Midnight release of a big blockbuster. But, even though the bones creak the next day and I survive on a measly three hours sleep (on a work night to boot!), I still have fun.
THOR was a godly level movie! (pun intended). I kneeled before its breath-taking cinematography and costumes. It sang gospels about Rainbow Bridges and Nine Realms. Thy cup runith over with Frost Giants and Warriors Three. Evil felt the might of Mjolnir (i.e. Thor’s Hammer). The sermon was simplistic but powerful—not complete unless filled with fire and brimstone (and an icicle or two). I gave my $10tithe and I was filled with joy and sunshine. Can I get an Amen!?
And like all good things, it ended way too fast. I prayed for more. (which we got at the end of the credits). Is it the best of the Marvel Universe films? No. (sorry, I might give that nod to Iron Man —well, until Capt. American comes out.) But is it Marvel Entertainment at its best? Yes. If anything, I will remember the line, “This drink... I like it! More!” Oh, and Stan’s cameo, maybe the best yet!! No lie.
5/6/2011
Remember in Lethal Weapon when Murtaugh tells Riggs, “I’m too old for this sh--!” I always say that after I go to a 12:01 Midnight release of a big blockbuster. But, even though the bones creak the next day and I survive on a measly three hours sleep (on a work night to boot!), I still have fun.
THOR was a godly level movie! (pun intended). I kneeled before its breath-taking cinematography and costumes. It sang gospels about Rainbow Bridges and Nine Realms. Thy cup runith over with Frost Giants and Warriors Three. Evil felt the might of Mjolnir (i.e. Thor’s Hammer). The sermon was simplistic but powerful—not complete unless filled with fire and brimstone (and an icicle or two). I gave my $10tithe and I was filled with joy and sunshine. Can I get an Amen!?
And like all good things, it ended way too fast. I prayed for more. (which we got at the end of the credits). Is it the best of the Marvel Universe films? No. (sorry, I might give that nod to Iron Man —well, until Capt. American comes out.) But is it Marvel Entertainment at its best? Yes. If anything, I will remember the line, “This drink... I like it! More!” Oh, and Stan’s cameo, maybe the best yet!! No lie.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Before the Show: Mighty God of Thunder!
Some thoughts on THOR! before the show
Before the Show: Mighty God of Thunder!
5/5/2011
The last time I watched a movie with Thor in it, it was 1987. Chris Parker (Elizabeth Shue) was babysitting Sara Anderson (Maia Brewton), who was the biggest Thor fan. Sara taught me the proper bow and line, “All hail mighty God of Thunder!” while pounding her tiny hammer on the ground two times. Oh wait. I watched the Incredible Hulk Returns in 1988 and that had Thor in it. So nix that first part.
Regardless. In less than 12 hours I will be watching the movie at 12:01 Midnight. By 3:00am I will wish Target was open so I can buy the Role-Play Hammer and Helmet from Hasbro Toys.
How can a movie about a God of Thunder go wrong? Its Asgard has visually pulled me into that mythological world. Seeing average army guys trying to lift a hammer of a god is joy in itself. Actually believing S.H.E.I.D can go toe to toe with a god will be worth all the popcorn in Nebraska. That being said, Marvel Entertainment is really clicking with creating, not only a movie franchise, but a movie universe. Heck, I’m not even turned off by that Star Wars girl being in it.
For those that think a Comic Book movie has to be sophisticated: it does have Anthony Hopkins and it’s directed by Kenneth Branagh (you know the Shakespeare guy). So put that in your pipe and smoke it!
Before the Show: Mighty God of Thunder!
5/5/2011
The last time I watched a movie with Thor in it, it was 1987. Chris Parker (Elizabeth Shue) was babysitting Sara Anderson (Maia Brewton), who was the biggest Thor fan. Sara taught me the proper bow and line, “All hail mighty God of Thunder!” while pounding her tiny hammer on the ground two times. Oh wait. I watched the Incredible Hulk Returns in 1988 and that had Thor in it. So nix that first part.
Regardless. In less than 12 hours I will be watching the movie at 12:01 Midnight. By 3:00am I will wish Target was open so I can buy the Role-Play Hammer and Helmet from Hasbro Toys.
How can a movie about a God of Thunder go wrong? Its Asgard has visually pulled me into that mythological world. Seeing average army guys trying to lift a hammer of a god is joy in itself. Actually believing S.H.E.I.D can go toe to toe with a god will be worth all the popcorn in Nebraska. That being said, Marvel Entertainment is really clicking with creating, not only a movie franchise, but a movie universe. Heck, I’m not even turned off by that Star Wars girl being in it.
For those that think a Comic Book movie has to be sophisticated: it does have Anthony Hopkins and it’s directed by Kenneth Branagh (you know the Shakespeare guy). So put that in your pipe and smoke it!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
After the Show: Fast Five
The first of the "After the Show" reviews.There may be a few scene spoilers but nothing on the overall story or plot twists.
After the show! (A review from a movie lover not a tight ass critic)
5/2/11
Fast Five is a movie that goes great with one of those Monster Truck Announcers-"Sunday,Sunday,Sunday!" as I was on the edge of my seat!
I had no doubts this movie would pay off. How can a fist and knuckle fight between "the Rock" and Vin Diesel not be worth the price of admission?! It gave me what I wanted: street racing in Dodge Hemi-fied police cars; thousands of 7.62 rounds fired; a bank heist that doesn't break into the vault but steal the vault (yeah, the whole frigging vault); and, cops who follow the path of honor even beyond their loyalty to a badge.
The fifth installment delivers no differently than the last four--maybe even more some. Old characters pop up and new ones are introduced. The writers have not forgotten to weave past events and characters throughout.
If you want two hours of fun while eating popcorn and slurping a soda, go see this movie! Oh, and stay through the credits. Like I need to say that nowadays but you'd be surprised how many jumped up and nearly missed the golden Easter Egg at the end…
After the show! (A review from a movie lover not a tight ass critic)
5/2/11
Fast Five is a movie that goes great with one of those Monster Truck Announcers-"Sunday,Sunday,Sunday!" as I was on the edge of my seat!
I had no doubts this movie would pay off. How can a fist and knuckle fight between "the Rock" and Vin Diesel not be worth the price of admission?! It gave me what I wanted: street racing in Dodge Hemi-fied police cars; thousands of 7.62 rounds fired; a bank heist that doesn't break into the vault but steal the vault (yeah, the whole frigging vault); and, cops who follow the path of honor even beyond their loyalty to a badge.
The fifth installment delivers no differently than the last four--maybe even more some. Old characters pop up and new ones are introduced. The writers have not forgotten to weave past events and characters throughout.
If you want two hours of fun while eating popcorn and slurping a soda, go see this movie! Oh, and stay through the credits. Like I need to say that nowadays but you'd be surprised how many jumped up and nearly missed the golden Easter Egg at the end…
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Before the Show
Here is the first of a "Before the Show" or my thoughts before I see a movie and it will be followed by an "After the Show" once I see said movie. This of course was written last week and was about Fast Five.
Before the Show (reviews of a movie using only the trailer)
4/29/2011
Why I think Fast Five will be the fuse to the Summer Movie Explosion.
If there were two kick-ass action stars in 2011, it would be Vin Diesel and Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson. Yeah, they’ve been around a while but unlike the aging action stars of days past like Ah-nold (who needs a shot of Metamucil in the morning) and Bruce Willis (who’s career has shown perhaps he doesn’t Die That Hard after all) they can still run from the explosions. And what can be better than having both of them in the same fraking movie?
Cars, Cops, Bad Guys, More Cars, Thievery (some committed by ex cops), Explosions, Cars Crashing and seeing both Vin and Rock in the same frame of film, is why I will enjoy this action adventure. This is the movie that will cause me to rev my 4 cylinder engine like an Indy Car driver, squeal tires as I leave the theater parking lot, and for about 5 minutes, actually consider quitting my day job and trading in my Saturn for a Nitrous-injected Honda to begin my days as a misunderstood street racer.
That’s all I need outta my $10 bucks! I don’t need this movie to impart wisdom or explain society through light and shadow…
Before the Show (reviews of a movie using only the trailer)
4/29/2011
Why I think Fast Five will be the fuse to the Summer Movie Explosion.
If there were two kick-ass action stars in 2011, it would be Vin Diesel and Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson. Yeah, they’ve been around a while but unlike the aging action stars of days past like Ah-nold (who needs a shot of Metamucil in the morning) and Bruce Willis (who’s career has shown perhaps he doesn’t Die That Hard after all) they can still run from the explosions. And what can be better than having both of them in the same fraking movie?
Cars, Cops, Bad Guys, More Cars, Thievery (some committed by ex cops), Explosions, Cars Crashing and seeing both Vin and Rock in the same frame of film, is why I will enjoy this action adventure. This is the movie that will cause me to rev my 4 cylinder engine like an Indy Car driver, squeal tires as I leave the theater parking lot, and for about 5 minutes, actually consider quitting my day job and trading in my Saturn for a Nitrous-injected Honda to begin my days as a misunderstood street racer.
That’s all I need outta my $10 bucks! I don’t need this movie to impart wisdom or explain society through light and shadow…
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Silver Screen Stuff
A friend wanted me to write a series of 200 word reviews of the 2011 Movies before and after I saw them for a new Geek site due to launch very soon. The following was the sample I provided to see if he liked my writing style. Lets say, I got the job. The site has been delayed but I thought I would share them in the mean time. I will link the site when it is ready to debut.
The Summer Movies 2011
4/26/11
Fast Five. So begins the summer! In less than one week, the movie roller coaster ride will begin. And, it will be a true roller coaster: full of ups and downs, throw in a few loop-dee-loops and a hard brake at the end.
If the 2011 movie season was a date with a beautiful woman, Fast Five would be the icebreaker; Thor would be the pick up line; Pirates 4, the overpriced meal (although very tasty and entertaining); Hangover 2 would be the drinks and dirty talk at the bar; Kung Fu Panda 2 is the awkward filled silence; followed by the hard decision of dessert between X-men First Class or Green Lantern (X-men luring by extreme flavor where Green Lantern only looking gorgeous on the plate); Transformers 3 will be the heavy petting in the car; Captain America is the exciting sex; and depending on stamina, the climax could be a blue ball of the Smurfs, a rough explosion of savage love in Conan or the primal release of Rise of Planets of the Apes.
If this kind of evening is not for you, then avoid the multiplexes. Until then, Fast Five looks to be the smoking hot blonde that just walked in the door….
The Summer Movies 2011
4/26/11
Fast Five. So begins the summer! In less than one week, the movie roller coaster ride will begin. And, it will be a true roller coaster: full of ups and downs, throw in a few loop-dee-loops and a hard brake at the end.
If the 2011 movie season was a date with a beautiful woman, Fast Five would be the icebreaker; Thor would be the pick up line; Pirates 4, the overpriced meal (although very tasty and entertaining); Hangover 2 would be the drinks and dirty talk at the bar; Kung Fu Panda 2 is the awkward filled silence; followed by the hard decision of dessert between X-men First Class or Green Lantern (X-men luring by extreme flavor where Green Lantern only looking gorgeous on the plate); Transformers 3 will be the heavy petting in the car; Captain America is the exciting sex; and depending on stamina, the climax could be a blue ball of the Smurfs, a rough explosion of savage love in Conan or the primal release of Rise of Planets of the Apes.
If this kind of evening is not for you, then avoid the multiplexes. Until then, Fast Five looks to be the smoking hot blonde that just walked in the door….
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)